I Haven't Been Myself

Chorus

I’m not alright I haven’t been myself lately / I’m not ok with the way I’ve let my thoughts overtake / take me away to the place I should have gone / I hope I’m not here for long / I’ll see you when I’m better /

it’s got to get worse to get better / it went from no way never to okay whatever / slowly but surely and sure is / blurry now things that once were me are no longer / every so often God reminds me / but I’m always there in front to blind me / I value my pride more than peace of mind / my precious pride / there was a time when I had control but I let go / I watched the world passin’ slowmo / my life’s ahead of me / I can’t catch up / stuck in a rut / I went to willingly / these thoughts are killing me / I wish I could control myself but I can’t / or can I / man I’m gone / I hope I’m not here for long / it’s just a visit / ashamed of who I’ve become / it’s not really me / or is it?! /

Chorus

thoughts lead to emotion which led to action / I hate the fact that it happened / “the lord can forgive and forget” / but I’m not able to do it / maybe there is where the problem lies / I’m unable to forgive myself plus I’m too proud to ask for help, whelp, sorry for who I’ve become / I guess circumstances can leave you numb / plus I refused accountability / it seemed like such small things you found in me / I called you secluded and illuded to the fact that your concerns were silly / don’t over-react / now looking back in hindsight, I’m able to see that you were right / is it too late for me / I know it’s not / it’s just up to me to choose to stop

Chorus (x3)